Motherhood is a blessing and a curse.
Motherhood is one of the most complex jobs any woman will ever face. It will leave you fulfilled, depressed, elated, and unnerved all at the same time. One thing I’ve never admitted is that motherhood is lonely.
Most of my days are spent conquering the hustle and bustle of raising four children. When I have time to myself, I feel as if I am missing out on the rest of my life. After perusing Facebook and Instagram pics of friends without children who are always laughing and appear to be having the best time, I realize how boring life seems. It is difficult to carve out a social life when there is a shoulder of responsibility that requires 24/7 attention. Each child needs his/her own physical, mental, and emotional support.
Motherhood is more than any one person can ask for, but I hear that the payoff is worth the struggle.
Motherhood is truly a blessing, so this is not a moaning session. I do enjoy occasional adult moments with my husband or with girlfriends. But, there are times I’d rather remain by myself in order to be readily available for my children. I long for the feeling of freedom and spiritedness of my twenties. I do want more for myself. However, I realize that this precious uninterrupted time with my children is temporary. While I have them around, I will make sure to cherish the moments. If the risk is fleeting moments of loneliness, then it is definitely a risk worth taking.
Are you a lonely, mama? Or, have you felt similar feelings?
Sometimes I just want to have a long conversation with someone other than my husband. Someone with female anatomy. Someone in the same life stage as me. Someone that gets me. But I can’t dwell on those thoughts. Loneliness breeds jealousy, and bitterness, and anger, and regret, and then guilt, and sleeplessness, grumpiness, impatience, grudges, depression, and on … and on … and on … (Kristen’s story)